SCOUTS HONOR?
Derfmagazine.com reports that Organizers of the Occupy Movement have strongly condemned the Girl Scouts of America, and say members are planning protests of what they call, “The Cookie One Percenters.”

“Each year, hard working Girl Scouts are sent out to do the bidding of their corrupt overlords,” says an Occupy spokesman. “They simply put a cute little face on a power structure that is set up to benefit an elite group of cookie barons who play by their own rules.” The spokesperson went on to make a bad pun about how the rest of us get crumbs, before heading back to his parent’s basement for well-deserved shower.
http://www.derfmagazine.com/news/business/occupy-girl-scout-cookies

WELL COIFFED HEADS ROLL
 After an unexpected loss in the Super Bowl, New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady has fired his entire hair and makeup team.

According to Derfmagazine.com, Brady’s hair and makeup squad arrived in town hours after the New England Patriots won the AFC championship, but their efforts apparently fell short. According to Brady's wife supermodel Giselle - "My husband throws the ball and the hair team is supposed to do his hair.  Is he supposed to do his own hair too?  They did a bad job this year and that's why he lost the game."

http://www.derfmagazine.com/news/sports/tom-brady-superbowl

And finally…
KIM KARDASHIAN SAYS CAUTION THE KEY TO MARRIAGE

Kim Kardashian says in a new magazine interview that she’ll be more cautious before tying the knot again, and it appears she means it. Sources at the E! Network are said to be hard at work focus-testing potential grooms, and an announcement as to the wedding date and subsequent divorce is expected soon, likely just in time for sweeps.